"I was meant for Sweden or Sweden was meant for me"

This is Sarah's first letter from Sweden- she already feels like "these are my people!"

Hejsan familjen!

So... I am Sweden! It has been an amazing adventure so far! My Heavenly Father loves me very much and He wants me to be happy. Oh my goodness: life at the Mission home was like paradise. I got to be with all my best friends and then with parent-like figures, in a home that was a mix between our home in Russia and an American home. The food was perfect and everything was perfect. But, I was excited to go out to where I belong.

On Thursday last, we all went out the the chapel in Täby (by the office and home) and had people talk to us for a long time about little detailed things we probably will not remember and we'll have to ask about again if we need it. Then our trainers came in to the room, but they didn't have their nametags on. Ooooo tricky! I thought I would never figure out who they were!! Are they even missionaries? I don't know! Anyway, then the President gave us letters and we read them outloud. I was called to serve in the area of Örebro (a couple hours west of Stockholm) with Syster Robinson. Cool, huh? So, then we had to talk to the Systrar and figure out which was our companion by having a Swedish conversation. I was confused. They told us we couldn't ask their name or what area they were serving in, but then I did not know how you would ever figure anything out... I even asked them how but they were just like, "I don't know." Apparently, we were supposed to ask the question, "Are you my companion?" Who knew? Apparently everyone else... ha So, at first she seemed a little grumpy, but she is way cool and way more positive than things I have seen before. It is great! I think her Swedish sounds really good too. She even does the Swedish Yoda/Gullom in-your-throat talk that Swedes do. Preceeeeeees (Presis) with their tongue all up in their throat and a wide spread eeeeee with the lips. It is funny. I am going to master it slowly. She was stressed out because we (well actually our whole district) is "white washing" which I guess means moving into a new area that neither of the missionaries had ever been in. She has never trained either and the District leader has never trained and of course then never been a trainer and has never been in his area and his companion is Äldste Dean from my MTC distrikt. Exciting! We had to lug around all this luggage from train to bus to apartment! It was pretty crazy. And one of her suitcases' wheels are broken. We dragged it around. Whew. We were worn out. Especially when we went the wrong way for about 5-10 minutes on a slight up-hill. It was kind of fun though. Don't ask me why. I do not think she thought it was fun but she was good about not being negative at all. She is really trying to be a good trainer I think. It is so nice to have someone in charge in the companionship. That doesn't mean she has to do everything but it just makes it so yoú are not always worried about stepping on toes all the time.

I was meant for Sweden or Sweden was meant for me. Seriously, if you saw the way people dressed and the general way they carry themselves, you would be like, "Hey! That is the exact way Sarah always wanted to dress and the way she always wanted to carry herself!" haha No, but every every every single girl wears like tights (I guess I couldn't wear this because it wouldn't be the standard of modesty I'd want to have... but I would want to because ... well just because) or just like leggings but thicker so more like pants and then they wear long shirts over them, casual but nice. And if they aren't wearing those and they want to be more casual, they were like straight sweat pants (meaning not super baggy) that gather at the ankles. And then the best part is their shoes. Everyone wears sneakers here! And they are like high-topping so they go over their little leggings or sweats and their ankles look so cute. haha bUT SERISOULY. haha oops that was an accidental caps lock. But that is funny so I will leave it. And everyone wears like casual hair, little clips or bobbypins, lots of pony tails. And they don't look sloppy. They look put-togehter. Anyway super cool. And here I am. haha no that's cool though.

So my first day here we found our way to röda korset (the red cross) where we taught two ladies that were from Syrian and Iraq Swedish. Ironic. I was taking lessons. ha No, but they couldn't really speak at all, so I think I helped a little. We taught grammar principles so that is what I learned more of. It was funny. I wasn't afraid to speak and the Swedish ladies were like "tre dagar! tre dagar!" (three days) all impressed and I was like, "oh!" all happy that people thought I was "duktig!" (smart or clever or bright... or beautiful. haha just kidding).

So in the city we heard a Michael Jackson song and I was like "yes! these are my people! that is what I am TALKing about!" It was like one of my favorites so it was either "Don't Stop til you get enough..." or "Rock with you". I really can't remember. I also heard my favorite ABBA song! " lay all your love on me" and I really haven't heard very much musik at all. It is cool.

The Lord has really blessed us! TWO investigators came to Church and we have never met them! One came with a member (speaks African French so that was cool to here him translate Swedish to French. My brain was about to blow up "Overload! Overload!"). The other we had called to set up and appointment with and then told invited him to Church but he was iffy and then we texted him the night before and then he came! Middle aged syrian man Schafik. Super coolt.

Oh my goodness gracious. This ward is ridiculous! 1) It is a ward (about 100 people) 2) they are just ridiculous! Every person came up to us and shook our hands (a little stressful because they all also talked to me so...) and they all love the new members that were recently baptized. The mission leader is so amazing! He taught so simply and such important basic things in the class and he is SO willing to do things. We usually teach people at the library so we were telling him that and then he was like, "wouldn't it be better if you taught in members' homes? I think that would be the best thing." Uuuh YA! Hello! Allå! It was like nothing to find members to go with us to our appointments this week. My companion is super surprised and really excited so I think that this is out of the ordinary. I know that is not really how our ward in Houston went. Well I don't really have any idea. They never asked me to do anything and I never knew the missionaries. They also had us bear our testimonies in testimony meeting. Oh dearie. I was nervous. An entire ward of Swedes. I was apraying. And I walked up there all "confidently" and bore my testimony relying upon the Holy Ghost and the mercy of the Lord. I actually said what I wanted to. I said that I felt like the Lord had many blessings he wanted to give Örebro and miracles in store. I expressed how excited I was to be there with them and in Sweden and on a mission. And I bore my testimony, especially of Jesus Christ and His church. I was just hoping they understood. The night before we were trackting and a lady could not understand me. Well, she couldn't understand my companion either... hmm maybe she as drunk...hm I do not know. Anyway that made me all nervous. People can't understand me?? Oh dearie.

But after the meeting people came up to me and they said I was "fantastis!" and they even said I have no accent! haha That one was probably a lie but they said "Americans usually have an accent. Who was your teacher? Do you do something with musik? That means you have a good ear." Then my head was like floating above my body so... I have to remember I don't speak Swedish. That's not really that easy to forget actually so that's good. I can understand about 50-60% at Church and about 80% with context and just guessing and then out of Gospel talk I can understand like 20-30%. 30 with hand motions and facial expressions. The ward is awesome. They will take really good care of us.

So funny stuff. In conversation tehre are a few things that are a little disconcerting. Sudden short gasps or intakes of breath during a conversation mean that the person in understanding, like "uh huh uh huh uh huh" with the head nod that Americans do. I hope that I won't have to translate it soon because I am always immediately like "wHAT?! are you okay!?" In my head and then I remember that actually means that everything is okay. They also say "Ah" that kind of goes up at the end, in tone. It sounds very condescending to me. They say that during a conversation instead of like "okay. okay" or like "ya. ya. I am starting to get it." It just sounds like "Uh yeah. I know... you stupid person." It doesn't mean that at all. haha well... I hope not... Anyway, just funny stuff. And then the yoda thing. haha I am going to be weirdo when I come back.

We have miracles ahead of us hear. We have met some promising people and the missionaries left a few promising people for us! This is exciting. Thanks for listening. It did put me in a better mood. I am just so tired... and it is the beginning... haha I can do it! And Spring is coming! It is not going to be exactly like this forever. Things change. Things progress! That is what I love about the Gospel. One of the things.

D&C 78:18-19 I think. That is my philosophy! I am not expected to know and be able to do everything now. The Lord will prepare me for things I need to be able to do in the future if I keep doing the best I know and living the commandments as best as I understand them. Life is great. Thanks for listening. I feel much better now! I love you all. I pray for you!

Love,
Sarah

In Sweden

Syster Page has been in Sweden for almost three weeks now and she seems to be loving it. This is a letter from about a week ago or so, and she seems to be having a wonderful time. It reminds me of something she once told me when she was probably 15- "no matter where you are or what you're doing, it's YOU who decide whether or not you are happy". I can tell that she is working hard and having some difficult times, but she always chooses to be happy through the trials.

Hej Hej Familjen!

I am so glad to be able to talk to you today. I cannot believe that I have only been in Örebro for less than two weeks! So much has happened! How much I will have to tell! (So much I will have conceal...) hahaha. I just shared that with Sys. Robinson. She didn't get it. I hope you do! ha Anyway...

We have had some great times. I thought today that I would tell you about some more detail-y, interesting intricacies of my missionary life. We travel primarily by bus here and by foot. I love the buses! It's so nice. No car to take car of and find a parking spot and fill up. BUT there is always a ride waiting for you at a pretty convenient time. So we wait at bus stops a lot and ride buses and talk to people there. My first day was funny. I was all pumped to talk to someone on the bus and this cool family gets on. The dad was pretty scary-looking (hairy and big) but the mom had a stroller and a baby and was talking to some other lady. I was sitting by the window. The man then turns and looks at me (weak smile from me) and then decides to sit down with his huge back to me so that he could face his family. I was pressed up against the window now. Oh it was funny. And stressful! They were all talking to each other and I was up against the wall and I wanted to talk to them but I didn't know how and I wanted to talk to someone but now I couldn't cause I was up against the wall. There is not really a cool ending to that particular story. They got off the bus.

We also contact a lot while walking. Oh boy that is crazy! All internally crazy. ("Do I talk to them? Should I talk to them? What about them? Oh I don't know what to say! Maybe my companion will talk to them. No. I should just talk to them. Don't I have any faith!?") "Hej, ursäkta!!" I usually try not to yell. I usually try to just say something at all. It is getting better. It is just hard to know who to talk to when there are dozens in front of you. Just open your mouth to someone! That's what I say. Anyway.

We had a few crazy men this week. They are old men that are a little crazy in the head. We met one that just came up to us while we were sitting in the library waiting for our investigator. I could not understand roughly 99% of what he said and it was very confusing because at one point he got very close to me and was smiling and patted my shoulder and I was like "Oh dearie..." and I was trying to have enough of a smile to be nice and not enough to be too nice. But oh man. And then at one point he stood up and started like jumping and dancing a little bit and then all of the sudden the most miserable look of despair came on his face and his whole person and he walked away with his eyes down and walked away muttering so sad. It was very sad. But then very funny. But then sad. My companion was by my side and all of the people in the library who were trying not to watch, so we were good. The other crazy man was just asking us for "Tia kronor! Tia kronor!" (ten crowns) Blowing cigarette smoke in our faces but he left as soon as I said "Jag har ingen pengar" (I have no money-- probably wrong.) He quickly moved on. Whew. That was at the train station on our way to Distrikt Meeting (Distrikts Mötet) in Västerås. (By the way: 'å' is my favorite Swedish letter. It is very pretty looking and cool sounding. It is like 'oh' but then with a tiny subtle 'a' at the end. The word for Easter på Svenska (in Swedish) is Påsk. It is kind of like a Brooklyn accent. Ho-at Do-ag for Hot Dog. Yeah... I don't know. Think about that one.)

Oh man. Funny story. And good story. We were going to go teach Henri (a new convert that we had never met in person) at Hans's house (a member who we had never met in person). Cool. We knock on Hans's door and he is like 22 and I was expecting 50. Okay. And then we are like "Hej hej" and he's all like "Henri is not here yet, right?" and Syster Robinson is like "Oh yeah no he said he'd be late." ... and then my companion realizes what he means (that that means we can't go in yet) so we are like "Uh well we should just go wait for Henri downstairs." haha Awkward #2 was waiting for mystery Henri. We say a few people come in but then this one guy was like "Hej hej" I was like "Hej hej...?" And then he must have realized and was like "Jag är Henri." ha funny. Then the lesson. Oh man. Nothing was too funny in there but then so many things afterward were funny because of Syster Robinson. I don't know if I'll ever be quite as uncomfortable with situations as she is. Oh man so hilarious. We were walking out of the building toward the bus stop and she is just like "Oh my goodness! Could it have been any more awkward!?" I was confused. haha She was saying how she had had to sit "on a bed next to a guy!" (on the end of a couch that was made into a bed and she was not next to him (Henri) at all, she was as close to the wall and as far from him as humanly possible). Oh so funny. She was freaking out. It was so funny. She was just talking about how she just couldn't speak and how she was like a robot and so boring. Oh so funny. Hans asked if we wanted to ficka afterward (which just means like drink something and eat something and just hang out/talk) and I wasn't sure what he had said so I couldn't respond and then Syster Robinson was apparently stunned from discomfort that she could not respond and it was just very uncomfortable for all present. Luckily she got out that "we have...bus...yeah" oh so funny. I hope that made you laugh because I was almost going the bathroom in my pants walking to the bus stop from the way Syster Robinson was reviewing the evening.

The lesson was really good though! I actually felt like I could express myself well. It was because I was bearing my testimony of the Savior. Henri had expressed to the previous sisters there that he did not feel worthy enough to go to church and take the Sacrament when he had not read the scriptures that week or something like that. He felt like he had to be perfect. We talked about the Gospel of Jesus Christ and how it is an ongoing process. I bore my testimony of the Atonement and of Jesus Christ. I said that I am weak. Since I have become a missionary I have really seen that I am not perfect. I said that I cannot speak Swedish and I am not brave enough or good enough to be able to do all the things that the Lord has commanded me to do, BUT that is why Jesus Christ came to earth. I testified that without Jesus Christ I am nothing. And with Him I can do anything. I need to use the Atonement in my life because I am not perfect.

I also had a very special experience bearing testimony to a lady on the sidewalk while we were walking to the Church for a child's baptism in the ward. She was out with her daughter and maybe husband. I was able to bare my testimony of how the Gospel of Jesus Christ blesses families. I explained how it had blessed my family by helping us love each other and serve each other better and helped us grow closer. I saw a physical change come over her. She was looking straight in my eyes and I knew that she knew that I was sincere. I love bearing testimony. That is when I feel the Spirit so strongly and my tongue is loosed. Much more is communicated in a testimony than words. The Spirit can carry our message of truth to there hearts. I saw that. She gave us her name-- Helen-- and pointed to where she lived and gave us the address! Miracles are happening here in Örebro.

We also went door tracting this week on Thursday evening before Påsk. No one was home for some reason. One door did open for us. This was exciting because we had a new little thing we wanted to try, especially for Påsk. We offered to sing a hymn about it. The man (about 30) stood at the door with his 3/4 year old son. He asked the son if he wanted to hear a song. The boy said no, all shy. We kept talking about Christ and how we celebrate Påsk by celebrating the reality of Jesus Christ. We offered him the "Finding Faith in Christ" DVD and asked him to watch it. He said sure. We asked if it would be okay if we came back sometime next week to see how it went. He hesitated and thought for like 5 full seconds and then was like, "Jah." Ja! He asked his son again if he was sure he didn't want to here a song. The boy said okej this time. We sang with all our hearts "Jag på Kristus Tror" ("I Believe in Chirst"). That was my testimony and I could feel that the spirit of testimony was reaching him. After the song, the boy ran to go get his Thomas the train and show us and then offered to sing us a song and then asked us to sing again. He even told us his mom could sing too. The dad (Johan) asked us wehere the church was and it just ended so well. We are going back on Thursday to see how the DVD went. The Lord has blessed us very much.

They only had Conference yesterday in Swedish... I was a little sad but it was a great blessing! I learned that I learn much more by the Spirit during Conference than through the words. Thoughts and impressions still came to me and the Spirit testified to me while Pres Monson was telling a story that I did not even understand that Jesus Christ lives and of how immense the Salvation that He offers us is! That confirmation to me by the Spirit and not by mere audible words gave me a great confidence that the Spirit really in my companion.

I have to go. I love you all very much. thank you for your prayers. One night, I really remember being impressed that you are praying for me and that I felt the strength from the prayers you give for me. Thank you. I love you. And thank you for the package! I love it all! I especially liked your note Abby. Those are definitely St Patricks Day socks... Easter green... hahaha. I love you! Have a great week and talk to you later! I wish I could share more!

Love,

Syster Page